Bored, dominant, impatient, and demanding?

My wife says Natalie is just acting as a two year old. I hope she is right. I have to stay on top of it.

About half a year ago it started. I had taught her the alphabet. She could recognize a letter and name it. One day I went through a popular alphabet book and asked on each page what letter was featured on it. At the time we reached the letter K she said: "That is ... that is ... that is Duh." I was not amused. "No, " I said, "this is the letter K. You know that!" And I turned the page. Then she went: "That is ... that is ... that is DUH." I closed the book and pretended I wanted to leave. She begged me to stay. "OK, but you have to tell papa the letters, OK?" Now the letter L came out without hesitation. Next, the M. "That is ... that is ... " I could feel the excitement. "That is DUH!" That was the end of it. I have not done any alphabet books since then. I concluded she was bored.

She is becoming more demanding every day. Whenever she wants something she says she NEEDS it. And that is when she is in a good mood. We are teaching her that crying for something does not help. Even just screaming "More milk!" is not effective. It just makes us ask: "What is the right way to ask?" And she knows: "Can I get some more milk, please?" Now she is also getting impatient. So she manages to communicate in less than three seconds: "More milk! Can I get some more milk please? Right now!" What can we do?

During our summer holiday we stayed a few days at friends. After less than a day she felt at home. The second day she had figured out that our hosts were quite amenable to meeting all her wishes. The third day she was commanding them.

Another day I wanted her to hold my hand while we crossed the street. She did not like it. So I asked again. She refused: "I don't need that." With a strong voice I demanded: "Come here!" She said No. I grabbed her, held her forcefully facing me and said strongly: "If papa says you come you don't say no, OK?" She said No.

It looks like she is getting out of control. Or am I just a bit dominant, impatient, and demanding?